Sunday, November 22, 2009

R.I.P William Michael "Mickey" Traylor


I Just found out a family friend passed away yesterday his nickname was "mickey" apparently he was out drinking with friends at someone's house or something i'm not sure  yet if he stayed at his friends house or went home but they found him dead.  i'm like in shock right now because no-one was expecting this.  he was just here last month with his dad and i remember i was in my room typing a 8 page paper and i heard a knock at my door, i thought it was my cousin so i didn't answer  because he could just easily walk in like he always did but it was mickey.  This boy was so in love with me it didn't make any sense, lol he was so adorable. i met him last summer when he came over with his dad (which is my mom's best friend since me & my twin was 1 yrs. old.) being that he was still living in ohio i didn't pursue a relationship with him  because me & long distance relationships just doesn't work  but everyone knew we wanted to be together  it was obvious.. but his dad told me he  was planning on moving here & surprising me & when he  was suppose to come here for thanksgiving in a few days which means we would of def. ended up together as a couple (officially)  but God had other plans for him... this is the craziest shxt ever  that i had to deal with but i'm so glad we had some good memories together that i will never forget & i always enjoyed his company, we spent last christmas together this was when we had our first kiss... man we def. had a blast and being i don't usually like christmas (because it's not the same since my grandma passed) he made sure i enjoyed it like that was something he just HAD to do..  everytime he was in town he had to make it his mission to come see me he wouldn't be worried about nothing else but me,whatever he could do that meant spending time with me he would do in a heartbeat, he came over a few days after christmas and we just watched sanford and son  & laughed our heads off and i ended up falling asleep in his arms & it felt so right like thats where i belonged. lil things like that i'm going to miss about him. he was also a writter, he loved writting poems and he wrote me one  while he was back home in ohio it was thee cutest thing i wish some how i could get that poem from his house idk how though.. & you know  the crazy thing is i was thinking about him earlier when i woke up and then a few hrs later my mom gets the call. Damn... i can't believe he is gone...  he had his whole life to live.. he was only 26, he just Graduated with a degree in Education and he wanted to be a specials ed. teacher.. His death opened my eyes to so much, we don't know the exact causes yet but i'm thinking it's alcohol posioning, or he threw up in his sleep and choked. he was indeed a heavy drinker the type that no-matter how much he had to drink he never looked drunk so he basically had a high tolerance. everytime he came over here he always said "lets get a bottle." the last time he was here a few wks. ago we all had drinks because he wanted to get a bottle. drirnking was just his thing. my mom told me to be careful with my drinking even though i don't drink nearly that much, i still do on occasions or if i go out, or at get togethers but  & being that my 21st is coming up in like 12 days, she just doesn't want anything like that happening to me or anybody for that matter. I mean its ok to have fun & enjoy yourself but not get over board.  I will be careful but i will take one shot for him on my bday.. I wont be able to say my Goodbyes at the funeral because he lives in ohio i really wish i could go but then again i don't think i could do it, i don't want to remember him laying in a casket, i rather remember him making me laugh & always being silly. his father is driving down in the morning to help his mother plan the funeral. (lord please be with his family during this difficult time.) I Love You Mickey forever & always , please watch over me bae. (R.I.P)


UPDATE :

11/25/09

I have been trying to keep my composure for the past couple of days but last night & tonight i couldn't hold it in any longer and i broke down being that when i first found out on sunday i haven't cried & everyday i keep getting reminded that he is no longer here & it really hurts to the core.. being in my room or even sitting in my living room all the places he was in my house makes me feel overwhelmed. today did it though, i never cried so hard in so long. earlier today me, my sis and our mom was talking and my sis said "he was moving here, he would of ended up being my brother in law because yall would of def. been together. no questions asked." & then she went into talking about the last time he was here last month and he said hi to her and the next thing out his mouth was "where jazz at ?" lol i talked about this above ^. but man his death is really hard for me to deal with, i'm praying it get's easier. I know he's in a better place but being it was so unexpectedly it's really hard to accept. But i have to remember God doesn't make mistakes & we all have a day where will leave this earth but only he know's these dates. I just wish i could of said Goodbye but i guess the last time he was here visiting was our "Goodbye" and we had no idea that would be the last hug & the last kiss. I'm going to try to take things day by day i know in due time it will get better. pray for me yall. i really , really need it. his dad said he will bring me some pictures and the obituary back when he get's back in town so i can have something to remember him by his picture is already on my blackberry screen so he's the first thing i see when i wake up & the last thing i see before i go to bed... I guess i'm about to try and get some much needed sleep.

6 comments:

  _*KEEKAKiLLS. (November 27, 2009 at 10:08 PM)

I heard the Forever Young song playing on here and I just busted out crying too because I listened to this when my best friend died and your story was so sad.

I know that nothing I say is going to take your pain away but I am here for you if you want someone to talk to. My email is cyclechic92@aol.com.

Just be strong and remember to wipe your tears because that's what he would be doing if he was with you.

I'm here for you girly <3

  sheiswinterwest (November 27, 2009 at 10:29 PM)

This was our favorite song the last time he was at my house he kept saying "play # 15, thats my song" and started singing it so this song reminds me of him & every time i listen to it i bust out into tears... Thank you so much Vinjenza, you don't know how much that means to me.. I'm about to e-mail you now.

  Lucie (November 28, 2009 at 3:44 PM)

Im so sorry sweetie.
im here for you.
And hope you have a happy thanksgiving.
Love you x

  sheiswinterwest (November 28, 2009 at 4:05 PM)

thank you sooooo much lucie lue! i actually enjoyed my thanksgiving even through these circumstances i just pushed through it & kept telling myself everything happens for a reason. my dad & brothers made it a good thanksgiving being surrounded with love since my mom & sis went out of town for the holiday. it's hard but i'm getting through it one day at a time. i love you more lucie!

  KEYS (November 28, 2009 at 10:41 PM)

wow.. i can't believe i missed this post. im SOOOO sorry for missing it but even more i send my condolences to you and your family<3

and take your time mama.. cry if you wanna cry.. scream if you wanna scream jsut let it all out. he loves you and he's watching over you and even though he doesnt want you crying im sure he understands. celebrate his life babe. he'll forever be with you in some kind way.

if you ever need/ want to talk theres many ways to reach me
AIM= mosKEYSH ( this one mostly ) or amorKEYS
or on bbm my pins is = 3020ACC3

  sheiswinterwest (November 28, 2009 at 11:25 PM)

Thank you so much keys! i appreciate the love & kind words. I'm def. hanging in there it has been one tough wk. but i know God doesn't give me more then i can handle after the rain its always sunshine right?. I'm sure i will still have my days where the tears will fall but like you said if i need to cry, cry! i saved our bbm hun.. Thank you, Thank you & Thank you again.

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